yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
