She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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