She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize