who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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