Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize