Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

My bottle opener just broke off in the cork

(248): View more from Michigan

They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts

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(248): My bottle opener just broke off in the cork (248): They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts http://tfl.nu/wcrk

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.

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(413): There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/whxc

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.

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(918): Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited. http://tfl.nu/jj7l

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(503): View more from Oregon

Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.

(360): View more from Washington

im coming over.

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(503): Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call. (360): im coming over. http://tfl.nu/x6qr

Replies (8) Good night (3531) Bad night (433)
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(954): View more from Florida

you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now

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(954): you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now http://tfl.nu/39yk

Replies (82) Good night (26531) Bad night (1387)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.

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(502): i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me. http://tfl.nu/n2du

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(702): View more from Nevada

was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars

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(702): was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars http://tfl.nu/nxps

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(631): View more from New York

i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world

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(631): i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world http://tfl.nu/qaz3

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(904): View more from Florida

Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.

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(904): Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up. http://tfl.nu/49qf

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(903): View more from Texas

Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.

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(903): Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/yv47

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(425): View more from Washington

please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr

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(425): please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr http://tfl.nu/rnxk

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(703): View more from Virginia

Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.

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(703): Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it. http://tfl.nu/3bav

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(714): View more from California

I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?

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(714): I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what? http://tfl.nu/ezau

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(910): View more from North Carolina

He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not

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(910): He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not http://tfl.nu/zx60

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(682): View more from Texas

I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.

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(682): I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life. http://tfl.nu/x9h1

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