Umm I'm too high to move.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
