respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
