I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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