Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
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my shit smells like andre
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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