Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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