Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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