Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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