Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
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