She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
