let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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