He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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