i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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