Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???