Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
