OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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