dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.