So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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