the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
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We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
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I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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