talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I am available for nakedness
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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