My liver just broke up with me...
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize