yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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