Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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