There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
