Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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