We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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