For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
my phone needs a breathalizer
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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