this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
And the cops told us we were all naked.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
