can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
COCAINE IS GR8
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
