she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
