i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
