I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
