She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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