This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
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the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
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I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.