he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize