so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I should be sponsored by Trojan
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
