You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Life is so much better after having sex.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.