THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
