That's intense
I showed him my bush... on skype.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
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I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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