I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
