Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
