rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
