this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I need water and some morals
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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