after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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