Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
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He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
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If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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