No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
